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Random quote: "You have a responsibility, because what you think has its affect - and you cannot get away from that." ~ Raj
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The significance of Last night's meeting
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Jennie
Posted 2003-01-25 11:43 PM (#570 - in reply to #473)
Subject: Easier said than done--need help


Elite Veteran

Posts: 737
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Location: Utah

I finally finished listening to most of the stream (it took me three sessions) and did indeed, Thish, get that it is time to start doing.

I have a very good friend I have been lovingly assisting for many years, who truely needs financial assistance, as well as physical assistance, grocery shopping, etc. And, I'm not the only friend that helps out. The problem arises with her grown children, who, instead of helping out, are desperately asking for our help. One, in particular, is about to become one of these street people, or move back in with her Mom. This wouldn't be such a bad thing in most people's eyes--having a grown daughter there to help out with grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, etc. But it rather has quite the opposite effect.

Now, Mom has to clean up after two people, and daughter is rather messy, and clumsy. She is also expensive to maintain, for the hot water bill goes sky high when daughter takes two long hot showers a day. When sending her to the store, you might as well kiss the change good by, because hair color and fingernail polish now become a necessity.

This is where I get stingy. How would Jesus have handled this?

She had a job, found by a local church friend, but after missing too much work, and telling the boss off, she's lost that. She gets in a bind and if everyone doesn't jump to help her out, she tries to commit suicide, and recently ended up in the State Mental Institution, where she has been many times and for long periods of times. They've told her mom, however, that she doesn't want her in there in the adult side...no way--no how. She's trying to get finincial help from the state, but don't know if it is going to come through. Her mother doesn't want the guilt of her death to live with the rest of her life, either.

The other morning she called me up at 5 AM and convinced me to give her the rent money as I drove through town on my way to work at 6:30 or she would lose her apartment that day. This was the straw that broke the camels back, and I was not very Christ Like. It's often 7 degrees below 0 and her living in the streets doesn't seem very charitable, but she can't live with me--either. I wouldn't be married much longer in that case.

What would Mother Theresa do?

Any one with a Christ Like way to handle this situation?

I can't say I don't have the money to give her, I do have some to spare each month. But she needs lessons in living, and handling money. Where she has been institutionalized much of her life, she seems to expect someone to care for her needs, and it drains her mom, physically and mentally. When she moves in I watch my friends strength plummet. Where my friend used to be able to walk a few steps to get to the car, she has to use her wheel chair. Her hands shake worse, and her daughter keeps her awake all hours of the night in one crises after another.

Well,

Appreciate any suggestions, Raj? I know you said we can't pray for that person to start behaving better, what would I pray for?

Jennie

 

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